Robb Lightfoot

It’s 7 am and the race is on–the daily sprint to the shower. Winner gets hot water; loser faces a cold blast of reality. The genius who designed our house put two bathrooms side by side, and then installed plumbing… Continue Reading →

“If we don’t leave now, why bother going?” My wife has her luggage packed.  My clothes are still piled on the bed. “Just two more emails,” I say. “It’s almost 11,” she folds her arms. “Won’t have to open the… Continue Reading →

“Know the rules well, so you can break them effectively.” ~ Dalai Lama XIV As of January 1st, there’s no free parking on Sunday in San Francisco, your employer can’t demand your Facebook password, and there’s now a limit on… Continue Reading →

My owners are off taking a break, so I offered to pound out Robb’s column on the old Selectric. This will be a quick yelp, since my double-dewclaws get hung up in the return key. Not sure why humans call… Continue Reading →

“Can’t we leave it up just a LITTLE longer, Mom.” “No. It’s browner than last week’s bananas.” “PLEASE.” “No. It’s a fire hazard.” “Chris still has his up.” “Chris has a plastic tree.” Mom had me there, it was true.… Continue Reading →

Every December, my wife and I clash on the most serious question of our time. Is fruitcake food or something far more sinister? My wife belongs to a not-so-secret society that LIKES fruitcake. I find this troubling. To me, the… Continue Reading →

Dear Santa: Do you really read all the letters people send to you? I was listening to “Santa Claus Is Coming To Town…” It says that you’re making a list, and checking it twice. How come? Do we get a… Continue Reading →

I love heartwarming headlines that reveal human nature. One such truth — no matter how badly you’ve screwed up, there’s always someone more inept. Proof? Minnesota’s Moon Rocks Missing No More. Ah, the “Gopher State,” their motto? “’Star of the North’… Continue Reading →

Hey, kids. Christmas is coming up, and it’s time to work up your Santa-list and the even longer one for your parents. As a reformed child, I know that getting what you want requires determination and lack-of-discipline. Here are keys… Continue Reading →