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When did “wanting” become a dirty word? When did we lose the capacity to see value in anticipation? And why does “wanting” usually feel synonymous with “lacking”?
There is nothing wrong with wanting in the absence of having. Trust that I’m speaking to myself here, too. The things we want do not have to become a source of pain simply because we can’t have them in the time frame that we want them.
One area of wanting that I hear about all the time is in the romance department. People can feel very lonely and stressed about not having a partner or mate. Of course, people can feel similarly about all sorts of things they feel they need to have in order to be happy and whole. This type of wanting is built on lack.
- Wanting from lack means that you, on some level, believe that you are insufficient without that thing. It means that you feel yourself to be “not enough” if you don’t have that relationship, that house, that car, that job, that external validation of your worth.
- Wanting from abundance means that you know — with or without that relationship, house, car, or job — you are still going to be OK; great, actually. It means that you believe you are enough, and that “enoughness” is not measured by external validation trophies.
True happiness is internal. It is a practice of reminding yourself that you are enough. Though there are plenty of external “things” that can make you feel amazing, that state of bliss is fragile because you have so little control over the temporary nature of the external world.
As you practice being enough, you are able to channel pure, loving abundant energy into achieving what you want. Brick by brick you can build your vision from a grounded place of strength, happiness and trust. The energy we invest is the energy we tend to see returned.
Lack begets lack and abundance begets abundance.