Go Fund Me Abuse: Are the ‘Go-Fund-Me’ Type Programs Merely Cyber Begging?

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Let me preface this by warning you this is a venting piece. Everything I do revolves around Conscious Living Concepts. And this problem I’m talking about flies in the face of these concepts. I practice and teach self-awareness and self-responsibility. You’ll see why this has me so worked up today.

Does it seem like the Go-Fund-Me and “Crowd Funding” requests are getting out of hand?

Today I saw a Go-Fund-Me request to help someone buy an airline ticket to a Caribbean Island for a vacation with her friends. “HU? & WTF?” were the expressions I’m sure I made. It dawned on me that these programs are the new wave of street corner beggars. The only difference is they don’t even need to leave their homes to beg for money. Instead of a bowl or cardboard box, they have a computer, PayPal, and smart phone to track their collections.

Here is how I see it. I’ve worked my entire adult life and some of my adolescence. Before completing my education I had quite a few awful jobs for very little money. I’ve gotten myself into and out of debt. I’ve had to take school and business loans (and pay them back with hard-earned money), and do without during the lean times. I was not born with a silver spoon in my mouth.

I believe in being responsible for oneself. So, when I get a request for money, not a loan, mind you, but a give-me-money-for-free-fund, for a business, vacation, or bail money – I’m appalled. I don’t think people get it. We are responsible for our own shit; the mistakes we make, the career or education we do or don’t choose, or the purchases we make. We own it.

It’s hard to watch people try to guilt others, with their sad stories (believe me – we all have a story) into giving them their hard-earned money. They wouldn’t need to ask if it weren’t for the fact they are too lazy or arrogant to cut back their expenses and live in a smaller home, (God forbid you have to live in an apartment), drive an older car, buy fewer new clothes or get rid of their cell phone and cable TV. It just makes me question our societal values. What are we teaching our kids about self-reliance and self-responsibility?

(Another reason our country is in such a financial pickle- even our government thinks this way- they just take it from us and call it “taxes”- but that is for another venting blog)

What Characteristics Do These New Age Beggars Have?

The New Age Beggar is great at emotional blackmail. They know how to appeal to your sense of guilt. They want you to feel badly about what you have so you’ll feel compelled to give yours to them. Remember the lunch room bully who did that with your cookies? Now they are grown up. They generally dress well, drive a nice car and live in a nice home. They don’t want to “do without” so they ask you to pay for their poor choices. Most likely they’ve blown it in some way- made bad financial, relationship or other life decisions. And now they want YOU to be their solution.

These Cyber Beggars need to get real. Do with less. Sell something. Get a second job (like the rest of us have done when needed) or stop spending. Perhaps you can’t afford a vacation this year? Maybe you need not shop at Whole Foods or Trader Joe’s for a few months? Or turn off the $160-a-month cable and read books or play games with your kids in the evenings? Cook at home instead of eating out? All the things my parents’ generation taught us about living without. My parents lived through the depression. They really knew what being “in need” was all about.

My parents taught us to be grateful for what we had and that if we didn’t have the money for something – there was a simple fact we had to face – we didn’t get to have it. We had to wait. We needed to work and save – which meant delaying our gratification.

Too many people are not accustomed to living their lives with this philosophy. They want what they want NOW. And if they can’t get any more credit cards (chances are those have been long gone) they will ask YOU to pay for what they want.

What Really Irks Me…

They ruin it for others. There are people out there using these programs who really do need help. A young mother of three who has a rare & horrific cancer and is undergoing a brutal surgery in hopes of saving her life – She needs our help to pay her medical bills and care for her children. (Emilee was raised in my neighborhood so I know it’s for real).

This family who has two, not one, TWO children sick with a life threatening illness. Their struggles are real. These programs are wonderful for these people who might not otherwise have a wide network of friends and family. Who are too sick or are caring for their sick kids and can’t work.

But now this potentially brilliant way of helping others is being abused.

Pay for my vacation. Buy me a car. Bail me out of jail. Seriously? Please help me understand what makes a person think this is OK. What mental gymnastics does one have to go through to come to the conclusion they should just ask others to pay for what they want? There is a HUGE difference between a WANT and a NEED by the way.
As a Libra and a Yogini my personality is such I can generally see both sides of an equation easily. However, this one has me stumped. If you can shed some light on this for me I’d be grateful.

(Life Code is a great book to read if you are easily bullied or guilt tripped into doing things your inner wisdom says DON’T!)

In the meantime – if you agree, please help me spread the idea that being responsible for yourself means meeting your own needs when you are able-bodied/able-minded – so the call for help by those who really DO need it won’t be camouflaged by these ridiculous cyber beggings.

If you disagree, I’d love to hear why and maybe you will help me see the side I’m unable to see right now. I’m open to learning more.

And, if you are really interested in paying for someone else’s vacation – well, never mind. I’ll pay for my own.

Nancy Sutton Pierce is the creator of Conscious Living Yoga and the Yoga To Go™ Series ~ a practice of waking up to the fullness of your life’s potential through the yoga experience.  Since earning her nursing degree in 1983, Nancy has been educating her clients & students about health, well-being, life satisfaction and the personal responsibility for each.

Nancy’s other professional endeavors have included writing the As You Desire Sex & Relationship Column for A News Café (and subsequently for the websitewww.AsYouDesire.net) and hosting her own talk radio show, The Conscious Living Show. She is currently completing her Doctorate Degree in Human Sexuality and will be available for consultations and speaking engagements as a Clinical Sexologist in the Fall 2015.

Married to the love of her life for nearly 22 years, Nancy and her husband Mark have raised three amazing kids into adulthood and now enjoy the blessings of the bonus kids (son and daughter-in-law) and three granddaughters.  Together they travel around the world teaching couples workshops in communication, intimacy and bringing back the playfulness in marriage.

Please feel free to Email Nancy with questions or comments NSP@NancySuttonPierce.com

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Dr. Nancy Sutton Pierce
Dr. Nancy Sutton Pierce’s eclectic background places her expertise in a league of its own. The compilation of her career as an RN, health educator, intimacy author, radio talk show host, and yoga therapist all fuel her passion as an International speaker and clinical sexologist. Earning her Doctorate degree in human sexuality has broadened her reach around the globe teaching Conscious Living Sexuality™. When not traveling the globe inspiring others, Dr. Nancy enjoys her home life with the love of her life for more than 30 years. They’ve raised three children and now bask in what she refers to as “the dessert of parenting” -- being grandparents. Website. Contact Dr. Nancy
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49 Responses

  1. Avatar Amanda says:

    Well said. I just saw one today for wedding expenses. I’ve also seen one a few times for dog surgery (the same dog that keeps getting hurt). That one was very hard for me.
    I think another problem with this new wave of beggary is we can’t help but judge the recipients financial choices. Their spending habits become our business. And I don’t like to know how others spend their money. It’s too much information.
    I have to point out that imo, Trader Joes is actually much more affordable than most grocery stores & comparable to the others. ????

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      Thank you Amanda,
      Wedding expenses hu? Wow! There is a huge sense of entitlement happening that floors me. However, I suppose we need to look more closely as the teachings they’ve been given. “Everyone gets an award” mentality could be back firing.

      Point taken about Trader Joes – thank you for clarifying. 🙂


  2. Avatar EasternCounty says:

    This is off the subject but is about the ease of using the Internet for odd purposes. I’m flummoxed as to why mere acquaintances feel others could possibly be interested in their political views when they have no notion of the recipients’ views. And the e-mails are so cruel. Apparently the anonymity provided by the Internet allows people to forward really malicious pieces featuring things they wouldn’t say in person.

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      Very true – all the terms like cyber bullying, cyber stalking, etc – people who would never in a million years say or do these thing face-to-face are acting out behind the curtain (or screen in these cases).

      Thank you for reading & commenting.

  3. Avatar Jeff Avery says:

    Nancy, I thought I was one of the few who had these thoughts. Talking with others they agree with all the points you made. Good discourse on self responsibility, government overspending, and well written to boot!

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      Thank you so much Jeff.

      I tend to say what I’m thinking without concern if it’s unpopular, and frequently discover it’s exactly what everyone else was thinking too. 🙂


  4. Avatar Hal Johnson says:

    I agree with your sentiment in the examples cited. But, I’ve also heard folks speak critically of people who resort to crowdfunding for creative endeavors such as recording an album or publishing an ebook. I think crowdfunding, in those cases, is entirely appropriate. No doubt abuses occur in those circumstances as well, but I think more often it allows folks of modest means to expose their art to the public.

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      I agree about the crowd funding – the thing about those is that they give something back in good faith for the money you’ve donated. A small piece of the product perhaps. It’s generally reciprocal. I have donated to a few of those that I believed in and was excited to support.

      • Avatar Hal Johnson says:

        There are many shades of gray with the crowdfunding issue. I was really surprised on two different occasions to hear people badmouth musicians and writers who resort crowdfunding. I hope that feeling isn’t widespread, and judging from this thread, most people don’t lump artistic endeavors with the frivolous ones. I’m glad.

        I’m kind of discouraged, though. Y’all have shamed me into abandoning my plans to launch a Go Fund Me campaign to get hair transplants in Costa Rica.

        (Heavy sigh.)

    • Avatar Tj g says:

      When it comes to people using it for that, there is usually products that you will receive for help with funding. So in a sense you are buying the product along with helping create it. That is a huge difference in comparison to people asking for money for a honeymoon or something like that.

  5. Avatar Mary Forbes says:

    Wow! And AMEN! Kudos to you for saying it so well, Nancy.

  6. Avatar Jen says:

    It’s no different than the cheerleaders down on the corner that are having a car wash to buy new uniforms. It’s just more in your face when it’s on your computer but we all have choices. You can choose to hide notifications from that person or that site and you can choose not to pull in the driveway for the car wash it’s no different.
    Doesn’t make it right a wrong I’m not saying that but it is very similar it’s just taken to a different level now.

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      The cheerleaders doing a fund raiser for their uniforms by WORKING for it – i.e., car wash, bake sale, dog walking, etc… is SO different from just creating a Go Fund Me Acct and start asking for money – nothing back – just give me money.

      I’ve always believed that money (ie votes as my husband calls them) is something you EARN by trading something of value in return.

  7. Avatar Laurie says:

    Re your comment “Another reason our country is in such a financial pickle- even our government thinks this way- they just take it from us and call it “taxes”–

    Not sure if this means you’re against the basic practice of a citizenry required to contribute funds to be used for the larger community. If that’s the case, without taxes, I don’t know how sure how we’d fund essential services such as public education, fire departments, infrastructure, etc.

    But if it’s not the principle of taxation that bothers you, just the amount you’re having to pay these days, factcheck.org and other reputable sources might make you feel less annoyed: http://www.factcheck.org/2012/07/tax-facts-lowest-rates-in-30-years/

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      Laurie, you can’t seriously believe that all the money you and I have paid in taxes has been used for the larger community?

      Like I stated in my article – that is for another blog.

  8. R.V. Scheide R.V. Scheide says:

    It’s certainly true that people are “crowd sourcing” some incredibly bogus stuff, as you noted in the story. But Go Fund Me and similar sites aren’t just for worthy causes in the way we usually think. Musicians, for example, have raised money to cut a new album or go on tour. That may seem frivolous to some, but certainly not the band and its fans, assuming the band can actually raise money. Most of the Cyber Beggars (nice phrase!) I’ve encountered don’t seem to raise much money for their outlandish causes and fold. The few that do attract a lot of attention of course.

  9. Avatar cheyenne says:

    This is why I have a spam blocker.

  10. Avatar K. Beck says:

    WOW! What a rant!

    Do you actually know all, or any, of the people you have just dumped on? “They generally dress well, drive a nice car and live in a nice home…are able-bodied/able-minded” How do you KNOW any of this? I think you assume too much.

    And, so what if they are not poor enough, by your standards? Just don’t give them money. How hard is that? They are on line, not standing in your living room with a knife to your throat.

    I suspect, or maybe hope, most people know a real “need” when they see one. I guess I have more confidence in the general public than you. A person can always do some research to find out if the need is real or not. You seem to think we are all half-witted idiots.

    People can, and will, ask you for almost anything. Doesn’t mean they get what they want. Doesn’t mean you have to give them what they want.

    “Emotional Blackmail…When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt”…if you are intimidated or “guilt tripped” when you receive these e-mails, get off the e-mail list. These people are NOT “in your life” they are on line.

    The definition of a bully is thus: a person who uses strength or power to harm or intimidate those who are weaker. How is asking for money on a web site or in an e-mail bullying? Let’s not minimize (dilute?) real bullying. Real bullying is very serious, indeed!


    • Avatar Nancy says:

      Dearest K,

      Thank you for your questions. I’ll do my best to address them.

      Q: “Do you actually know all, or any, of the people you have just dumped on? ”
      A: Of course I do – why do you think I wrote it? Your assumptions about me and my knowledge of this topic were incorrect.
      Did you read the part about “so the call for help by those who really DO need it won’t be camouflaged by these ridiculous cyber beggings.”? And Yes – someone I know asked for her flight to be paid for so she could take a vacation with her buddies. Yes – someone I know asked for people to donate $27,000 so she could pay off her boyfriends car that she had co-signed for (oops). There are more… I won’t bore you.

      Q: How hard is that? They are on line, not standing in your living room with a knife to your throat.
      A: The main drive for my rant was the fact these bogus requests devalue (and camouflage) programs such as Go Fund Me or Crowdfunding when help is truely needed. After enough of the bogus ones, no one will give a second glance to any of them – distrust builds with experiences such as these.

      Q: How is asking for money on a web site or in an e-mail bullying?

      A: I agree that any bullying is horrendous and dangerous. Perhaps bullying is used incorrectly here – how about harrassment – maybe that is more fitting?

      I have a large footprint in the social media world for my business- so perhaps my exposure is greater than yours. I’m delighted for you that this new way of begging has not affected you – I hope it doesn’t. But you can tell by the majority of comments that many others are. The world of Internet and Social Media has opened up some wonderful and some not so wonderful avenues. This happens to be the latter.

      If you are unable to relate to the cyber begging frustration… let me ask you this… Have you traveled to other countries where you cannot move without being asked for money, food, etc? What affect did that have on YOU?

      Again – thank you for taking the time to read the article and then to share your thoughts. Always appreciated.

      • Avatar K. Beck says:

        I stay as far away from “social media” as I can get, so had no idea any of this goes on. You have just given me more reasons to stay away.

        I have had e-mail for a long time. In the beginning (before the web) there were “news groups”. I learned way back then to just hit the delete key. I never saw the point in getting my blood pressure up because of something someone wrote that I didn’t like. Delete and move on.

        I worked with someone who loaned her boyfriend her car, knowing full well that he had no license because of a DUI. He got drunk and ran over two children who were playing in their driveway. When I was hit up to financially help her out (“help the co-worker”), she needed a lawyer, I politely declined stating that if I had an inclination to financially help any of the people in this situation it would be the parents of the children involved and that was the end of the asking.

        When I travel I read about the history & customs of the
        country and the social structure so I know what to expect. When traveling to “developing countries” I understand that I will be looked upon as being rich, because in those countries I am rich. It has nothing to do with my class status in the US, as far as the people who are begging are concerned, if I can afford to travel to their country I must be wealthy. It is annoying, but I take no personal offense to it.

        There are reasons people are poor, sometimes it has nothing to do with their own actions. I personally know people who are working three jobs. That is what they need to do to survive. Sometimes people get in a bad situation and don’t know how to get out of it. Bad things happen to people. A lot of people are just one pay check away from living on the street. Once you are on the street it is very difficult to get off the street. Not everyone gets a high paying job. I don’t jump to the conclusion that all “those people” are scum bags.

        I figure I am lucky to have what I have. If my health was bad, or any one of a number of bad things could have happened to me, I could be living on the street myself.

        “…these bogus requests devalue (and camouflage) programs such as Go Fund Me or Crowdfunding when help is truely needed.”

        And I repeat: “I suspect, or maybe hope, most people know a real “need” when they see one. I guess I have more confidence in the general public than you. A person can always do some research to find out if the need is real or not. You seem to think we are all half-witted idiots.”

        Besides, if I want to give someone $50. for a vacation what business is it of yours? It’s my $50 to spend as I choose. Right?

        • Avatar Hal Johnson says:

          “You seem to think we’re all half-witted idiots.” I’ve read Nancy’s article a couple of times now, and even though I’m likely slightly to the bleeding heart side of the issue compared to her, I don’t feel like she was suggesting that I’m a half-witted idiot. It seems like you’re more interested in picking a fight than taking issue with Nancy’s position. That’s a shame, but it also seems to be a fact of life in Internet America. You have the multitudes on your side, or so it seems.

          • Avatar Breakfast Guy says:

            I kind of stand with K. Beck on this (less the half-witted idiots part). I too have seen no evidence of it happening here. Only a few similar mailings of political nature, but they go directly to Updates or Promotions folders only, which are easy to delete after a few have
            Of course staying clear of most social media, fb, & such probably prevent cyber beggars from landing in my regular inbox.

          • Avatar Nancy says:

            Dear Breakfast guy,
            I never mentioned getting these in my email box. It’s all on Social Media – Perhaps that is why you are unaware? And remember – just because we don’t see it or know it to be true – doesn’t mean it isn’t happening for real.

            I wasn’t making it up.

  11. Avatar Joanne Lobeski-Snyder says:

    Great article Nancy. I think the most important thing you wrote is that kooky “Go-Fund-Me” requests devalue serious requests. You and I grew up with the same values about financial responsibility. Because you use the word “guilt”, I sense that the “Go-Fund-Me” requests you are receiving are from people you know, the children of friends or relatives. Is this a new trend? I did not participate in the last “Go-Fund-Me” for a a family member. A history of unpaid loans, extravagant living and disconnect between “need” and “want” made it easy to avoid hitting that button. You worked and are still working hard for you money. YOU get to choose how you spend that money.

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      Hi Joanne,
      Yes the ones I was referring to were from people I knew… some tagged all of my social media accts in them to solicit from my pool of people. The two authentic ones I linked to were shared by trusted friends.

      Just like anything on the internet – we all have to be responsible for what we post and what we share – fact check before sharing. This will help minimize the cyber junk we have to sift through to find the valuable gems.


  12. A. Jacoby A. Jacoby says:

    Well, where do I sign on to get in this conga-line of venting. I SO AGREE!! Looking at your responses, I’d say that you articulated what so many of us feel.
    #1. the proliferation of nonsense requests (and yes, they ARE nonsense) obscuring the valid requests and endeavors.
    #2. R-E-S-P-O-N-S-I-B-I-T-Y HAS to come before R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

    And a word about those car-washes, bake sales, etc. I’ve been involved in hundreds of hours of these endeavors because I wanted to take my students to festivals and clinics where they could hear and be involved in experiential learning. There is no institutional funding for that and many of the kids were from families that could not afford to simply “write a check” for that kind of event. This fund raising activity afforded all the kids and families to EARN their way. Let me tell you, the kids and their families worked hard. Operative word here: WORKED! In no way can these endeavors be compared to cyber-begging, except that it true that it is YOUR choice to say yes or no . . . in all cases.

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      Hi Mrs. Jacoby!!
      Thank you for that – and yes, I was floored when someone compared the car wash, etc fund raisers to the Go Fund MY Fun programs! You should have seen my face! lol

      Thank you for joining the conga line – it’s getting longer!

  13. Steve Steve says:

    I’ve always been a sceptic of these crowdfunding websites. “I want to expand my boutique coffeeshop without going into debt.” “We want users to share in the funding of this unique technology so that they have a real stake in it.” “Help me to personally courier a shipment of used cell phones to Fiji for donation to the natives.”

    Then, just this morning I read that we’re going to get a sequel to “Super Troopers,” thanks to a crowdfunding campaign on Indiegogo.

    I believe.

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      What happened to the days when you saved your money, took out a business loan, or waited to get what you wanted? Humph – I guess those are gone. (I hate when my age shows through)

  14. Nancy, have you been reading my mind?

    Thanks for being brave enough to shine some much-needed light on the burgeoning beggar culture. Accountability and self-reliance appear to absent at every level of society and with so many hands reaching out, it’s becoming impossible to identify those truly in need.

    I’m so suspicious nowadays, I rarely donate to anything other than charities I KNOW to be legitimate… like Hal’s Costa Rican hair transplants 🙂

    • Avatar Hal Johnson says:

      Carla, it is so heartening to know that someone takes my cause seriously. Sniff.

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      Thank you for taking the time to read and reply. I don’t worry about being policically correct -since that changes often. I speak from a place of what affects me personally and how. I am just one. And if my experience and thoughts resonate with you – then we know we are not alone.

      And it’s ok to agree to disagree. The point is for us all to be able to express our own experiences and not try to argue that a perception of an experience is right or wrong – it’s neither – it’s just a perception.

      I’m all for supporting the Hair transplants too – good call! 🙂

    • Avatar EasternCounty says:

      Carla, you’ve been in my thoughts — not because of this article but because of your previous one about foxtails. My Springer had to have emergency surgery for a foxtail in her nostril. We keep her closely clipped and always put cotton in her ears this time of year, but I know of no way to protect her nose.

  15. Avatar Ginny says:

    Your Q&A answer to K. Beck was excellent. Thank you!

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      I almost replied the last one – but decided it’s not worth it. She has no idea or experience regarding what I wrote about and seems to just want an argument. I’m not interested in that.

      Social media is like another planet – unless you spend time there – you have no idea how different that world is.

      Thank you for the kind comment.

  16. Avatar Michelle says:

    I agree with all points but but take exception to the suggestion to shop at Trader Joe’s or Whole Foods to save money. Neither can compete with Winco type low price grocery stores. I am all for being frugal in all ways, but people really on a budget are stretching their money to get the most value cannot afford to shop there regularly. Healthier choices, yes, best prices? Not! Especially the latter which is strategically located in metropolitan areas with higher incomes. (clearly not in Redding for a reason)

  17. Avatar Dorothy says:

    One of the problems today is that, there are not enough jobs for young people. When you and I were growing up, we could easily get a part time job, to make spending money.
    Have you ever seen the long lines of people, waiting to apply for a minimum wage job, in
    fast food restaurants , etc.? Do I think some people are not taking responsibility? Of course. It has always been that way in any society.

    I get irked at cashiers in grocery stores and dept. stores, asking for donations to whatever is the cause of the day. I just say “No thank you, I have my own charities.”
    Simple as that.

    • Avatar Nancy says:

      Hi Dorothy – I’m so with you on the jobs for teens problem. I worked as a teen (nothing so exciting as your first pay check!) & my kids worked as teens (they all have amazing work ethics and would never consider asking others to pay for their frivolities). I think by making it harder for them now we have done them a huge disservice.

      Although somehow I don’t see that as the root of the problem – I see it more in line with two things – 1) the need for immediate gratification, and 2) a sense of entitlement.

      I hear the tone of expectation that someone else who has should just give to someone who wants without question. How do they think the person who has, got what they have? Inquiring minds…

      The more I know, the more questions I have.

      Thanks for reading – and for taking the time to write. Greatly appreciated!

  18. Avatar Doreen O. says:

    Excellent article, Nancy. While I think we could use a few more jobs for teens, I also feel that if teens try hard enough, they can usually find “something,” it might be out in the hot sun instead of inside, though. The one that irks me the most is that young people cannot deliver papers anymore. My eldest started delivering papers when he was in junior high and it contributed to his great work ethic and ability to get along with all types of people. It also really helped our family out because he paid the expenses for his own dog and some other items we couldn’t afford.

  19. Avatar EasternCounty says:

    Since I don’t participate in any social media, I was completely unaware of GoFundMe and the like. Thanks to ANewsCafe and this article, I’ve now been enlightened. Then today, I received an e-mail from a friend whose granddaughter will be competing in an international event. I wanted to donate to her cause, and when I clicked on the link, I was taken to the GoFundMe site. Since I knew who and what it was for, I went through the steps to donate. But I was never have known about it were it not for this site.

  20. Avatar Tj g says:

    I saw one today for a wedding and honeymoon funding. See that is what inspired me to see what others think about it and that’s how I arerived here.

  21. Avatar Bonnie Graham says:

    Let me join the “conga line!” I happened to see one of my own family members sign up for a GoFundMe page and her purpose flat out angered me. To the point I wanted to call her up and ask her if she was truly serious!?
    Also, last week I nearly gave in and helped a fellow RV’r (someone who travels in their RV) who was having issues – only to find out that their same “issue” had been going since 2013! The issue – a broken truck that after 1.2 years is still not fixed.
    So rather than blog on this myself and thus make my family and “friend” mad, I decided to Google my irritation and then happened upon your site. AMEN!!!

  22. Avatar Lea says:

    Interesting topic indeed. My politics are generally liberal. And yet, when it comes to personal responsibility…I’m in big time. Forty-five years ago, I was a teenage, unwed mother. Thankfully, I had a wonderful doctor, and was also allowed “welfare.” I grew up in an upper middle class family. I was so humiliated. And yet, I’m so proud of the fact that when my daughter was four, I walked into the “welfare” department, and asked to be taken off welfare. They were so shocked! “We don’t have a system in place for this.” My perspective remains that society should allow one lapse in judgement, and don’t fund the others. I made a very conscious decision to have only one child. And I have been paying taxes ever since! I do understand that it’s so much more difficult for getting jobs these days. And yet, it’s hard for me to reconcile seeing folks lament the lack of jobs, and continuing to have more children.
    I just sent off a check today to my niece. She does a bit of the computer fund raising thing. Her child has MD, and he’s in a wheelchair. She shares visitation with her former husband, who has a very good job. My niece has a small farm, and according to my sister, about $200,000 in her IRA. I don’t want to judge, and yet, Nancy, your article affirmed some of my thinking. Thank you. xo

  23. Avatar Sue says:

    Just when I thought I’d seen the worst of it — up pops these guys with their cheesy hustle — and the most revolting, tasteless, disingenuous, meritless example of felonious greed ever displayed on GoFundMe… But don’t take my word for it!

    Check it out for yourself:


    (who is that freak in the video with the shifty eyes and obviously fake green screen background?) …and who tries to take advantage of the GoFundme community in an overt attempt to fleece $25 MILLION dollars for their private shopping club?! Talk about one scam on top of the other!!

    I’m sorry, I don’t ever vent like this…
    But after agreeing with everyone here — and then seeing this blatant bastardized attempt to profiteer at the expense of others I just had to say something. Am I wrong?

  24. Avatar Nicole says:

    I know someone who had a go fund me and it drives me nuts. She put it up for her dogs surgery. She put a whole song and dance that she isn’t working anymore and can’t find work. This is the same woman who is buying $400 tables and vacation trailers and eating out constantly plus her child is still in daycare six months since she last worked. If she had cut any of these she would have paid for it herself but she is selfish and wants the goodlife as well. The rest of us live honestly and pay ourselves and cut all the extra’s out when these things happen. I was horrified she raised half the amount. Must be people who don’t see her spending all this money on facebook.

  25. Avatar Amy C. says:

    If you want to know what makes this “okay,” look no further than the folks who buy into the sob story and actually contribute to these folks. The enablers are (as usual) the ones who make this type of shameless begging okay.

  26. Avatar kiki says:

    Nancy…. your parents lived through the depression? There hasn’t been a depression since the brief 1920-21 farm fail and the fall of the stock market in 1929. Heavens, girl, how old are you? Other than this discrepancy, I like your blog!

  27. Avatar HeatherNo says:

    Yes it’s begging. They even beg for somebody to buy them stuff off the Wishlist on Amazon. Daughter tells me they get guys to do it by sending nudes. Nasty. All of it, freebies, begging, entitlement. No thanks.