Reflections in a Mirror (While Shaving): Part 20


•I don’t get it…when I run on the treadmill, I feel like my hair is flying, then I look in the mirror and I’m frigging not moving…I guess the flying hair image should have been a give away.

•When I got up this morning, I realized I had only one shot at this day. I could spend it watching re-runs on TV…or I could take a walk, read a book or laugh my butt off for any reason. Oops, gotta run… a CSI marathon is starting.

•Three of my favorite things…birds, corn-on-the-cob and black cars.

•The outdoor cat looks at me very sincerely when I lecture him about not chasing birds…a small feather floats from his whiskers to the ground.

•I lose five pounds; I drop off an armload of suits to be altered. Reverse the process when I gain five pounds. My tailor hums a happy tune, she and her sewing machine working in quiet unison.

•What is it that’s so damned attractive about a smile?

•Someday soon, I’m going to exercise again…but I have to call it something other than jogging…the Joggers of America Ass(n) has complained my shuffle/stutter-walk is an embarrassment…yeah, well, get over it.

•Can you remember a “perfect” day? When the forces converged to allow the day to end with a “YES”!…

…after years of working and commuting to school, I was awaiting the results of my bar exam. I was told a small envelope was a notification that I’d passed and a large envelope meant I failed because it would contain my failing test scores and an application to try again… I received a large envelope… I’ll forever remember Cherry (my champion) chasing and stopping the mailman, telling him there must be a smaller envelope for me… he shook his head…

…the notification I passed was inside the large envelope, along with an insurance application and other items I can’t remember. My perfect day started about as low as a snail’s belly and ended with elation hard to describe.

P.S.: Your “perfect day” has to exclude marriages and birth of kids…an arbitrary rule to be sure but this game should be about you.

•Why do I worry about things past, done or dead?

•When I “reward” myself with a sweet, I act like a lottery winner. By the way, the original sticky cinnamon buns at the California State Fair were worth the trip. Dozens of us wolfing down piping hot buns so we could get back in line for another.

•Most people want to be nice…if it isn’t too much trouble.

•When I grow up, I want to be gardener…mostly flowers, lettuce, melons and a few potatoes. Other jobs making the short “but for” list:

  1. Oil executive…probably not the right time.
  2. Wall Street trader…heart not strong enough.
  3. Left fielder for the Red Sox…can’t hit a curve ball.

Doug Mudford’s photo illustration by Michael Burke of Redding. Click here to see more Michael Burke photos.

Doug Mudford is a lawyer and partner at Barr & Mudford, with an emphasis on serious personal injury. He may be reached at Barr & Mudford, 1824 Court St., Redding, 530.243.8008. Send questions for “That Lawyer Guy” to

Doug Mudford
is a lawyer and partner at Barr & Mudford, with an emphasis on serious personal injury. He may be reached at Barr & Mudford, 1824 Court St., Redding, (530) 243-8008, or
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