SEX is my favorite subject. Anything and everything connected to living a sexy life enthralls me. And now, every month in As You Desire, I will have the opportunity to share with you all ways in which we can experience a sexy life.
When this idea was presented to me I didn’t hesitate to say “yes.” There are pivotal moments in life when opportunity knocks. Being prepared and willing to leap are key factors in taking charge of those moments. This is one of those moments for me – I’m able to put my written word where my mouth has always been by sharing my interest and vast curiosity in this As You Desire monthly column at ANewsCafe.com. I am thrilled and frankly a little scared (mainly for my husband). As You Desire will be honest, entertaining and often raw in our discussions about sexuality, sensual pleasures and relationships.
What qualifies me to write this? I am first and foremost a vitally alive sexual female being. As a woman I add to that list; Wife, Mother, Grandmother, Girlfriend, Nurse, Health Educator, Wellness Coach, Yoga Therapist, Yoga Studio Owner, Radio Talk Show Host, etc. And underneath it all, I am first a pure sexual being who is very interested in staying that way! Are you?
When did I know I was a Sexpert? Well, it seems I have always excelled in the study of sexuality; beginning in fifth grade when they were introducing Sex Ed in the schools, I sat front and center. Soaking up sex information like a sponge, I couldn’t wait to get home and start my personal interviews. After the first class I went home that night and immediately asked my mom, “How many times a week do you and Dad have intercourse?” Oh, you should have seen the look on her face! My mom was shy, reserved and actually quite naïve. The next day she marched into the school, giving them a piece of her mind. I don’t know what she said, but apparently she was the only parent who complained. At that point it became clear I needed to learn all I could because I couldn’t count on her for Sex Ed support. Mom was not going to be a reliable resource for me and I had many questions she couldn’t answer. (She told me that monthly menstrual cycles were the way a woman’s body rid itself of all the poisons … Yikes!)
My girlfriends and I talked about, read about, sneaked into movies about S-E-X when ever we could. Boys were the main topic of any conversation. When I lost my virginity it was because I was curious, not because some boy talked me into it. I planned it.
In college my favorite class was the Human Sexuality Class. My teacher was Allure Jeffcoat. \Yes, that was her real name. (I thought about using it for my pseudonym for this column). We talked about every topic under the sexual sun. I loved it. Everything was interesting to me. Even what might be considered taboo topics became areas of fascination. I was more curious about the areas I didn’t understand because obviously “some” people found them exciting and satisfying (even if I didn’t). I have no judgments around sexuality between consenting adults. This, in and of itself, is freeing!
In our home, we have always had very open conversations with our kids (sometimes WE are the ones saying TMI!) about sexuality. They know they can tell us anything without judgment. We want them to enjoy healthy, fun and exciting sexual lives. This began when they sensed from us that sex is normal, natural and not something to have guilt or fear around. As parents we set the tone for our kids, so we need to have a clear understanding of our own beliefs and how they are impacting our words and actions.
Despite my mom’s lack of sexual knowledge, my own curiosity and experiences created an early comfort in being open and free sexually. Her gift as a parent was in not laying her own fears and ignorance onto me. I grew up somehow knowing sex is natural, normal, functional, fun and playful. I know that enjoying being sexual is our birth right, yet so many suffer deep fears, guilt, frustrations & ignorance around this subject (often based on religious teachings). I will bring these out into the open so we can recapture the free-spirited enjoyment of our sexuality. It’s all about attitude, and I’m here to help our society recognize we have a choice in the attitudes and beliefs we hold. We have joined this life and body to learn, create and enjoy. We can choose joy over sorrow; expression over suppression; freedom over restraint. What do you choose?
My goal is to help you keep the sexy spark alive within yourself and your intimate relationships.
In order to do so, we need to blast this subject wide open! No topic will be off limits. I’m sending you all an open invitation to write to me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Ask anything. The only rule is that you keep the respect bar high. We are here to grow and learn. You can offer up your personal experiences and concerns. Remember, we are all the same: sharing a desire for love, acceptance, happiness, abundance and a sexually vital life. Many of you, however, want this but don’t have a clue where to begin!
Let’s begin with a return to flirting. Next column: “Flirting: A Lost Art?”
Nancy Sutton Pierce RN, Health Educator is the Founding director of Nancy Sutton’s House of Yoga and Radio Talk Show Host on The Conscious Living Show LIVE every Saturday 11a-12noon on KCNR 1460am You can reach Nancy at email@example.com with your comment or questions.
As You Desire is proudly sponsored by Body Logic MD; helping both men and women restore their libido and vitality through hormone therapy, fitness and nutrition counseling. www.bodylogicmd.com
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