Looking in the mirror this morning, I thought of the photographer the day before, “Let’s shoot your good side”, he said. Using the crooked mirror behind me, I looked at both saggy profiles … I laughed …hell, shoot ‘em both.
As I was walking to the barn, a road runner streaked across the road … third time I’ve seen it. Rattlesnakes don’t like road runners, which make the sleek little critters really popular with me. Beep, beep.
Peanut butter sandwiches at 3 a.m. … playing IPhone solitaire … not a bad way to treat insomnia.
I like people who say “holy moly”… working it into a conversation while swearing like a sailor is even more likable.
Do sailors really swear like … well … sailors? The only personal reference I have is a long deceased uncle (Navy) who made an art form of the profane.
What to do when the check comes and there’s no prior agreement how to deal with it? … the check just sits there, silent, unclaimed with half hearted offers to pay from those who now think the meal was over-priced.
Felt bad when we split the check and his credit card was rejected. Felt worse when mine did a belly flop.
My card was once rejected at Macy’s because of an “unusual spending pattern”. It scared me a little that buying underwear and a tie was unusual enough to set off alarms. What if they were right?
Macy’s called Visa … I gave my password to a nice young man at the corporate office. He said
“How do I know it’s you, mister?”
“Look, you smart little #@%&*”
“OK, OK, it’s you.”
Saw a former classmate … man that sucker looked old! I must have been wrong about us being in the same class.
Do I get mad at the airlines for allowing the seat to recline or the boar (sic…sorta) sitting in front of me who tries to knock my knees where they shouldn’t be knocked?
Excuse me sir. I would like to apologize for my inconsiderate knees interfering with your comfort. Of course I didn’t say that … part of the reason is that once I open my mouth, I can’t stop. I want to insult his heritage, his mother, his haircut and his choice of colognes … not the safest way to travel.
Older gent, bald in front, 20-inch ponytail, low rider jeans with a roll of fat hanging over the belt … holy *&%$#@ moly.
Things I like about Redding businesses:
- Gus McEntire’s combination of recycling and profit in his landscaping business.
- Doni & Kelly using determination and a lotta attitude to create an exciting new business.
- Lyle Tullis, trying to create a gravel business (we need it) and going about it the right way. Regardless of which faction wins, the dialogue has allowed every viewpoint to be expressed.
- Rod Rodriguez keeping his promise to rebuild the fire-destroyed “Hatch Cover”…creating in it’s place the terrific “Rivers Restaurant”. Go Cal.
My friend Mark says he’s had been shaving a stranger for 15 years. I like the line but if he heard it on Letterman and is passing it off as his own, I’m reporting him because there’s only room for one plagiarist in this here blog.
Do I write a blog or a column? What’s the difference? Should I care? From the mirror … “OK it’s going to be one of those mornings … just get in the car, adjust the ‘interesting’ tie and head for work.” Beep, beep…
Doug Mudford is a lawyer and partner at Barr & Mudford, with an emphasis on serious personal injury. He may be reached at Barr & Mudford, 1824 Court St., Redding, 530.243.8008. Send questions for “That Lawyer Guy” to doug@ca-lawyer.com.
