Dear J,
I’m so unhappy with how the election turned out. I’m so sad, mad and frustrated that it’s beginning to affect my work and family life! I’m obsessing! Help me!
Fran B.
Dear Fran,
The long, torturous election season invaded many households. The seductive aspect of something as monumental as electing the leader of the free world tends to overtake all the details of everyday life. For a time, the petty slights and annoyances in the course of a day can be deflected onto the ‘other’ and we can enjoy a clear shot at right and wrong.
Problem is, it’s an illusion, never as clearcut as it seems. Once the election is over, we have to go back to the gray areas of life, relationships and work.
Think of this as an opportunity to drop back and take in the big picture: Your intense involvement and concern allowed you to be part of something so large that it will take the sweep of history to sort it all out. Sit comfortably and take a long, deep breath. Allow yourself to experience being a voter, an American, a citizen of the world, a part of history.
Where you are in this moment is all that you have. How is that? You must live out the future one moment at a time. As you sit quietly, think of three small things that you can begin to do or to change right now in your life, in your family or in your community that will carry your vision into the future. (Write them down and put a date on the paper. Whenever you begin to obsess, revisit those three things).
You are on your way to changing the world.
“Dear J” is a North State advice column that offers insight about every aspect of life. We invite readers to weigh in with suggestions, feedback and answers to the questions, below. Send your “Dear J” questions in care of anewscafe@gmail.com. (We maintain strict confidentiality.)
