Step on up, ladies and gentlemen, you're a VIP ticket holder to the amazing shit show! Once you've entered, you won't be able to turn away from the mesmerizing tales of crap and woe that wait for you beyond. Join me one and all for my true story of the crappiest weekend on record. The magnificent shit show of all shit shows.
It was one day B.C. (Before Carr), and I had four dogs in the house. Two were my own, the other two (Mia and Lukas) belonged to friends who were each on vacation. One of the canines - I'm still not absolutely sure which one - experienced some gastrointestinal distress on a level that left me unhinged and sent family members fleeing far and wide.
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