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Doni’s Dish: A Conversation with Doug Mudford, of ‘Reflections in a Mirror’

Doni: Columnist Doug Mudford, would you do me the honor of being my partner in Doni’s Dish? I hope you’ll say yes.

Doug: I’ll have to think about Doni’s Dish. How does it actually work? All at once? Over time? On a certain day? If I come across as boring, can you pull the plug?

Doni: Don’t worry. Doing the Dish is easy. I’ll email you a short list of statements/questions. You reply, and add feedback, as well as your own questions/statements. It’ll grow from there, back and forth, as we add to it with our responses, just as if we were talking. It’ll take days, maybe even a week.

And trust me, you won’t be boring. We’ll keep it conversational and light and funny. Dishes are among my favorite things to do. You’ll see. You’ll like it, too.

Doug: OK, I’ll give the Dish a try … guess I’ll have to put on a clean shirt and watch my language … @&*%!.

Doni: Thank you! Let’s get started before you change your mind. No need to put on a clean shirt. This will be easy and fun. Thanks for agreeing to it. (Sign here, here and here, and here, and here.)

Doug:  I had (have) reservations about doing the Dish because I have clumsy fingers trying to keep up with your agile mind. I like email and texting but my friends could take a short trip by the time I actually get a response in a “send” format. Are you one of those people whose fingers can keep up with your thought process? If so, just relax, this Dish could take a while.  I admire your reporter instinct of wanting to see what’s behind the mirror, but the reflected image is usually so danged much better. Would you want people looking behind your mirror?

Doni: Well, good point – about not wanting people to see behind my mirror (not about you being technically slow). Uh, if behind the mirror you mean my insecure, doubting self, no, I wouldn’t want people to see that part of me.

Doug: Yep, that self … but I prefer to think of us as inquisitive and flexible.

Doni: Yeah, I like the sounds of those words better than insecure and doubting. Speaking of flexible, for a short time you wrote another column for aNewsCafe.com. It was called “That Lawyer Guy,” which is a catchy title. But you dropped it and started the “Reflections” column. Which reminds me … what made you change columns?

Doug: I hated doing “That Lawyer Guy.” There are so many people better at that style of a column. I did it because you asked me … when  A News Cafe was first starting. From the beginning I was trying to figure out a way to convince you to let me try something different. I was nervous when I submitted the first “Reflections in a Mirror While Shaving” because I was afraid you would laugh at me … wait,wait,wait, I wanted you to smile or laugh but not AT me. I’ve admired your writing for a long time but don’t you ever get  a little nervous (before publication) that maybe a column just isn’t very good? If you recall, you agreed to tell me if “Reflections” would be embarrassing to me or you.

Doni: I did say I’d tell you if your column was embarrassing. But your column has been far from embarrassing. It’s been a hit. You know why? Because you write honest thoughts – some funny, some serious – that the rest of us can relate to. You make us feel normal – or at least not alone in our abnormality. Your column style reminds me of Herb Caen, you know, with all those ellipses, and the humorous, smart observations.

Doug: I’m printing and saving your last comment because it describes what I hoped for. I saved a column of yours written some time ago that gave me that same feeling. Now can I get a raise? You’re so nice, I doubt you would tell me but that’s OK, portions of most friendships are based on the “you can’t handle the truth” principle.

Doni: I can handle the truth. OK, wait. Maybe I can’t. Never mind. Hey, subject change … About that raise … do you want that in Tollhouse cookies, Snickerdoodles or molasses ginger snaps?

Kidding aside, I know I’m really curious about this, and maybe readers are, too, but how exactly do you go about creating the Reflections columns? Do you gather items for a long time, and then turn them into a column when you’ve got enough? Do you write it all at one time from memory?

Doug: The thoughts in the column come in spurts … sometimes a column is finished as fast as I can type (with the above clumsy fingers caveat) … sometimes scribbled notes over a week or so. The thoughts usually come while watching and listening to people, thinking of something silly I’ve done and, yes, while shaving.

Doni: So people should be careful what they say around you. Duly noted. So, that’s interesting. (Long pause.)

Doug: No need to watch what you say. For purposes of “Reflections” I’m more interested in an individual’s appearance … I make up what they should say. I can’t seem to sit and come up with a column on demand. I’m not afraid of writer’s block … in fact, when the column becomes forced, I’ll welcome it.

Doni: That sounds like a challenge. Be careful what you wish for. Speaking of writing, I hate to put you on the spot (which means I’m about to) but do you really think in snippets like that?

Doug: … yes … yes I do … (Sorry. I couldn’t resist.)

Doni: Wow. Fascinating. I wonder how many other people think like that? Maybe most people do … and I’m the outcast. Here’s something else I want to know: When you were a kid, what did you dream of becoming when you grew up?

Doug: Do you mean you think in paragraphs?

Doni: Well, sentences, at the very least. Back to your dream occupation when you were a kid. Not very creative stalling, I might add.

Doug: Until 14, I wanted to be a dentist until a nice teacher told me I would actually have to understand chemistry and math. We both had a good laugh over that improbability. From early on, I wanted to be a lawyer and/or a writer. I got a late start in both … maybe that’s why I still enjoy both.

Doni: I can totally relate to the math issue. I almost didn’t enroll in college because I was so terrified of the required math classes. But that’s cool you have two things you really enjoy doing. Some people have none.

Doug: We all have more than none. It’s just so hard to give them a real try. Did you ever think you would be on the cutting edge of the electronic news media? My wife Cherry decided late she would like to be paid for working in a library … and did! (She is however rolling her eyes, just a little, when I tell her my latest project is to take saxophone lessons in the barn.)

My question is a little different for you … when did you first realize you could earn a living by writing?

Doni: Well, I was one of those kids for whom writing was easier than talking. Still is. I enrolled in college when I was in my 30s, and was originally going to be a social worker, until I took a creative writing class from a woman named Joan Haworth. She pulled me aside after class one day and asked if I’d ever considered a career in writing. I literally changed majors that day from psychology to journalism. I kept the psychology minor, though, because it was interesting.

We’re talking about me, again, Doug. Very clever. You cannot throw me off track that easily. And no, I never thought I’d be running a news website. Never in a pillion billion jillion years. Enough about my job.

What’s the most difficult part about being a lawyer?

Doug: You are a sly person, Doni …you couldn’t give me a softball question about what I like or dislike the most … It has to be the “most difficult” … instead of rattling off some pat answer, I actually have to think about that. Geez. I would say managing expectations … injuries are always more serious when they’ve happened to us. It’s difficult to put that very personal hurt in perspective with similar injuries to others. Whether we like it or not, other cases involving similar injuries, settlements, trials and rulings need to be weighed when deciding the direction to go.

Doni: I’ll take “sly” as a compliment, thank you so very much. But regarding your job, I would imagine the specialty of personal injury makes your vocation so potentially stressful. I’m sure you see all kinds of injuries that are really nightmare material. It must be satisfying to win a case on behalf of clients who’ve had so much go wrong.

Doug: Perspective helps … real stress is not being able to feed your child or being told you’re terminally ill. While I’m usually talking to people at one of the low points in their lives, it’s most satisfying when my help brings them a little self-confidence and a smile … doesn’t always happen.

Doni: OK, on a lighter note, being as though you liked my “difficult” question about work, what’s the most difficult part about being a writer?

Doug: For me, that’s easy to identify … it’s the ability to say “enough!” Leave it as written … no more changes, futzing, putzing or any other …utzings. I have one rule … when the number of drafts has exceeded all possible numerical and letter combinations, it’s time to move on.

Doni: I do believe you’ve just invented a new word: “utzing.” But I get your point. To me, that means you’re a natural writer, Doug. You know, I’ve heard of some lawyers who actually achieve quite a bit of acclaim writing fiction. Is there a novel behind that reflection?

Doug: I’ve started two novels I keep hidden … probably utzing around too much to ever finish. I admire people like Charlie Price who just kept after it until he won.

How about you, Doni? Ever thought of writing a novel? What genre? Maybe A News Cafe could add the “Embryo Book Feature,” which would allow frustrated authors to submit a chapter for comments and criticism. Submissions would be under pseudonyms, of course.

Doni: I knew it! I knew you had a novel in you, but two! As that wonderful line goes in the movie, “Throw Mama From the Train,” – “A writer always writes. Always.”

Me? Well, since you asked, yes, I have been working on a book, but I’m kind of shy about talking about it.  And you’re right when you say that writers like our Edgar-Award-winning friend Charlie Price are inspirational. If he ever teaches writing workshops I’ll be his first student and will sit in the front row.

You know, I really like your idea about the “Embryo Book Feature,” but then I think of putting my chapters up for review, and I fear someone would recommend an abortion for it. Sorry, had to follow the metaphor.

This might be a good place to stop, don’t you think?

Oh, wait, readers, I have two questions for you: First, is there something new you’ve dreamed of trying – something outside of your comfort zone, whether it’s becoming a librarian or playing the saxophone or writing a book? What’s stopping you?

And, second, although Doug will kill me for this, I do get the last word in Doni’s Dish, so what do you think about “Reflections in a Mirror While Shaving?”

Independent online journalist Doni Greenberg founded what’s now known as anewscafe.com in 2007 with her son, Joe Domke of the Czech Republic. Prior to 2007 Greenberg was an award-winning newspaper opinion columnist, feature and food writer recognized by the Associated Press, the California Newspaper Publishers Association and E.W. Scripps. She lives in Redding, CA.

A News Cafe, founded in Shasta County by Redding, CA journalist Doni Greenberg, is the place for people craving local Northern California news, commentary, food, arts and entertainment. Views and opinions expressed here are not necessarily those of anewscafe.com.

Doni Chamberlain

Independent online journalist Doni Chamberlain founded A News Cafe in 2007 with her son, Joe Domke. Chamberlain holds a Bachelor's Degree in journalism from CSU, Chico. She's an award-winning newspaper opinion columnist, feature and food writer recognized by the Associated Press, the California Newspaper Publishers Association and E.W. Scripps. She's been featured and quoted in The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Post, L.A. Times, Slate. Bloomberg News and on CNN, KQED and KPFA. She lives in Redding, California.

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